Presidential Candidate Donald Trump Takes Aim at Double-Dipping

Finally, a political belief that both the left and right can rally behind. As revealed by a profile in The New York Times, Donald Trump is soul-shiveringly offended by double dippers. As reported by Mark Leibovich, the reveal went down when Trump offered him a shrimp.

Here’s how it unfolded:

Do you want to wash your hands or something?” Trump asked when I joined him in the main cabin. Trump hates germs (“I am very, very clean”). He was also hungry. He barreled back to a pantry area arrayed with tin trays of chicken, shrimp, sea bass and chateaubriand. “Beautiful stuff,” Trump marveled over the spread. “There’s more food than it’s yooooomanly possible to eat.” He shoveled big spoons of potato au gratin onto his plate and then turned to the shrimp. “You like shrimp?” he said. He urged me to indulge, just as long as I did not double-dip in the cocktail sauce. This is a pet issue for him. He was recently at a cocktail party, and they were passing around hors d’oeuvres. “This big, heavy guy takes the shrimp, puts it in, bit it and puts it in again,” he told me. Trump was appalled at the repeat dunking, even in the retelling. “I said, ‘You just [expletive] double-­dipped!’ He didn’t know what I was talking about.”

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So there you have it. No double dipping. Why there isn’t a single issue political party dedicated to this cause is anyone’s guess.

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