So-Called “Ninja Thief” is Obviously Not a Ninja

Witnesses told police that a Holiday Inn in Milford, Ohio was robbed by a ninja and let’s just hold it right there. First of all, ninjas would never rob anything. They are too busy training their bodies to be ultimate fighting machines. Second, and much more importantly, ninjas don’t have witnesses. Ninjas are invisible and silent as the night, and, for the sake of argument, if a ninja ever did rob a Holiday Inn, no one would be the wiser. So, clearly, the only real news stories here are that a man in black pajamas robbed a Holiday Inn and that Milford’s news crew needs to check their facts …

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