The Points Don’t Matter

As a busy college student/Relevant intern, I find it hard to balance everything that I need to do. I have come to rely heavily on the use of lists to keep my life in order. Not that my life is in order, but if it were, it would be because of my lists. Also, I’ve discovered that it is easier for people to read things that are put in bulleted format and bold print terms help people follow along (or just pick and choose what they want to read).
Point Number One:

Nose Rings Are Soo Rad.

Getting my nose pierced may seem like a strange thing to be on my to-do list, but I have been wanting to get one for quite a while now so as to “toughen up” my image. People usually see me as the sweet, innocent, girl-next-door type. There’s nothing wrong with that, and truth be told I guess I kind of am that type, but I think it’s time to be a little more hardcore. It was the nose ring or a tat, and my fear of commitment led me to want a hole in my head more than art on my bod.
But my nose ring desire goes beyond merely bodily desecration or artistic expression. Nose rings in the Bible were symbols of a covenant: when Abraham’s servant found Rebekah and whisked her off to marry Isaac, he offered her a nose ring as a symbol of her commitment and pending marriage. Now, I’m not getting married anytime soon, but it’s kind of like a promise ring, right? A sign of God-commitment and abstinent purity by driving a diamond stud through my nostril? Mabes.
My mother is not buying the whole biblical-covenant-nose-ring idea. I already have two holes in each ear and a pierced navel, so I can only imagine where she thinks I’m going with the piercings:

Perhaps it will come to this. All in good time.
Point Number Two:

Lessons Are Everywhere.

You know the cliché about learning more in the real world than you will in a classroom. Well, this internship is a great example of that. Sure, I’ve learned about editorial duties and the publication process. But I’ve also learned that British people use tea kettles(whatever those are), Chipotle has a cult following, you should never ever compliment one co-worker and not another (duh, man!) and stereotypes are not always true.
I had this weird thought in my head that Relevant staffers must listen to good music because the bands in the mag are always pretty spot-on. But this is not always the case. Sometimes the eds like to forgo Ben Folds and New Amsterdams and mix things up a little by playing Missy Elliot and Fergie. I’m not a hater, but if your chorus consists of you spelling a long word, I don’t care how glamorous you think you are: I’m just not a fan.
Point Number Three:

Everyone Loves a Jewish Girl.

Tomorrow is the Jewish festival of Purim, a time to celebrate the story of Queen Esther and how she saved the Jewish people from the wicked Haman (booo.) I love the story of Esther for many reasons:
1) She’s a girl. As the often unsung hero(ines) of the Bible, girls usually have a background role. But Esther has her own book, which makes her awesome.
2) One of my favorite biblical quotes comes from Esther:
“For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?” That’s Mordecai telling Esther to get on the ball. I like it because it’s saying God wants you but he doesn’t need you. So get over yourself and do what you’re supposed to do.
3) Esther was hot. She was chosen out of all the young virgins to be the new queen because the king was “most attracted to her.” Being in that royal position allowed Esther to save the lives of countless Jews. Who says Christian gals can’t use their looks and charm for good?
4) Esther fun fact: The name of God is never mentioned in the book of Esther. He is subtly implied but never referenced. It’s a little strange that a compilation of writings about God would include a book that never mentions God; but I think we can learn from this that God is everywhere and in everything, even those things that are not blatantly “Christian.”
5) And last, everyone should love Purim because it is an opportunity to not only remember Esther but also to dress up. Gather up your tiaras and ball gowns, ladies, because this is better than a Jewish Halloween.
Point Number Four:

Spring Breakdown.

See Also

That was more of a title than a point. But my point is, I just got back from spring break. I was pretty stoked to relax and be outside a lot. Thanks to the rays and my deep personal objection to sunscreen (I hear it causes cancer), now I’m chocolate brown (my roommate says beet red, but she is wrong). I’ve also been seeing the college gut lately so I vowed to be active: During my sporting adventures, my little brother tried to teach me how to skateboard and I fell on my face. I tried to teach my friend how to surf and she fell on her face (we also saw sharks). We played beach volleyball and I got bruises on my arm. I think I am supposed to learn from all of this that God did not intend for me to be sporty.
Point Number Five:

Shake It Like a Polaroid Picture.

I ran out of points quite a few points ago, but there’s something complete about the number five. Hmm…OK, I got nothing.

OK, OK. This is probably enough nonsense. Have some Chipotle for dinner and if you’re coordinated, play an organized sport in my honor.

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