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Welcome to Taylor Swift’s Incredible New World

Does the sunshine seem a little sweeter? Do the brooks babble a bit more sugary? Does the laughter of children fill you with new delight? Of course it does. Global superstar and benevolent fairy godmother Taylor Swift has ushered in a new era of joy and fidelity by announcing a new album. It’s called 1989, the year Taylor’s cherished soul first graced our weary planet. The cover is a Polaroid, because she is the ghost of a Civil War widow. And the first single is called “Shake It Off,” which is about dancing, ignoring the haters and the charmed whirlwind that Taylor Swift calls life. Welcome to the new world order …

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