Look, we just report the news around here. And today’s news is that following the inexplicable and maddening success of SyFy’s direct-to-television Sharknado dumpster, a second one is in the works. We’ll give you a second to calm the bubbly froth of joy overflowing from your heart. Since it would really be against the brand to put any actual work into this thing, the “brains” behind Sharknado crowdsourced the sequel’s title to Twitter, and Twitter came up with (sorry, sad drumroll, please) Sharknado 2: the Second One. Look. There’s no need to rail on this. Really, there’s something vaguely impressive about how hard these people are working at being lazy. The only quibble we will bring up is that an absolutely perfect title was suggested by Patton Oswalt, and it is criminal that SyFy passed it over …
