Elsie Fisher, the young Golden Globe-nominated star of Eighth Grade is as mad at the Oscars as you are. Well, maybe. Everyone’s mad about the Oscars for some reason or other, even if you’re just mad that other people seem to care about it so much. But unlike most people, Fisher has decided to do something about it: create her own, vastly superior film awards: the Elsie Awards!
Now, admittedly, it’s just a Twitter thread but think about it: is a tweet really that much less meaningful than a little golden statue? In any case, what the Elsies lack in glitz and glamor they more than make up for in charm, a deep appreciation for smaller films that tend to get overlooked during award season and social media accessibility.
For example, Fisher wisely parsed out nominations by genre, meaning she’s giving out awards for Best Horror Feature (Us, Ready or Not, Climax and Midsommar) and Best Independent Feature (Booksmart, The Art of Self Defense, The Lighthouse and Honey Boy) instead of having, say, Booksmart and Us go head to head.
Likewise, she highlights Best Young Performer, so that 10-year-old Julia Butters (Once Upon a Time in …Hollywood) doesn’t have to face off against Laura Dern. See? This is objectively better.
So what’s nominated? A rich tapestry of 2019’s best achievements in film. For example, are you rightfully upset that Lupita Nyong’o was snubbed for her work in Us? Well, she was nominated for Best Actress here, along with Awkwafina (The Farewell), Ana De Armas (Knives Out) and Constance Wu (Hustlers).
Do you feel like Adam Sandler’s work in Uncut Gems should have gotten some attention? The Elsies do too. Sandler got his nomination there, along with Taron Egerton (Rocketman), Adam Driver (presumably Marriage Story), Robert DeNiro (The Irishman) and Robert Pattinson (The Lighthouse).
And the cream of the crop, the Best Picture nominees: The Farewell, Parasite, Honeyboy and Jojo Rabbit. As you can see, it’s not altogether different from the Oscars, which nominated Jojo Rabbit and Parasite for the same award. It’s just better.
And Joker, which dominated the announcements with 11 nominations, alas walks away with just one Elsie nom, for Best Hair and Makeup.
You can see all the Elsie noms here and tune in at 9PM PST tonight to catch the winners for Hollywood’s most charming night.