How to Keep Your Marriage Strong

5 habits to cultivate regularly to maintain a healthy marriage.

Google “marriage jokes” and these are some of the things you’ll find:

Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence–a life sentence.

Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached.

Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind.

I really despise marriage jokes. First, I despise them because they are critical, negative and completely discouraging. But secondly, I despise them because, at the core, they reflect the heart of a very broken society, with a very twisted view of marriage. They reflect a world around us that is struggling to see marriage as a blessing, but rather see it as a hindrance.

Turn on the TV and you will hear and see story after story of broken marriages, destructive relationships, struggling families and the on-again-off-again romance of Hollywood that confirms our society’s apathetic view on holy matrimony.    

I despise marriage jokes because I believe they affirm the very thing the Enemy is trying to do in the world around us: steal, kill and destroy our God-ordained, God-given, God-created relationships. They make light of a very serious matter and snuff the image of God in the very relationships that were meant to reflect and honor Him.

Marriage is a road full of really hard choices, ridiculous selflessness, and constant service. But it is a journey full of blessing, healing and hope.

Marriage is no walk in the park. It is a road full of really hard choices, ridiculous selflessness, and constant service. But it is a journey full of blessing, healing and hope. It is a hazy glimpse of God’s incredible love found in the eyes of another human being.

My husband, John, and I take this seriously, and we try to live out this kind of love each and every single day. Some days are way harder than others, and many times we make mistakes. But more than anything, we have committed to five things to keep our marriage strong:

1. Maintain Your Friendship

It’s easier to be friends than lovers. And those who start as friends make the best lovers. Friendship provides deep roots from which a healthy marriage can grow strong.

Each component to your friendship is like a string—and each one ties the two of you together and holds you close. Along with attraction, you share similar interests, hobbies, passions and beliefs that keep you connected.

But you also will have many differences, and you must work to maintain the friendship aspect in your marriage by seeing those differences as opportunities to learn, experience, and get to know one another even more. 

My husband and I love spending time together and experiencing things with one another. We consider the other as our best friend. We don’t let our marriage cover over our friendship—it only accentuates it.

2. Remember to Laugh

When I met John, I thought he was the funniest man alive. Now I know better,   but the truth of the matter is he keeps me laughing and makes me smile. We have so much fun together, and some of our most intimate memories involve us laughing until there are tears streaming down our faces. 

There is a time and place in marriage for tears of frustration, anger and sadness, but there should also be a time for tears of joy. Make that a priority in your marriage.

3. Confess to Each Other

As hard as it is, John and I are getting really good at saying sorry. But we’ve evolved. We don’t just say sorry anymore, because the word “sorry” doesn’t always hold much meaning. We have learned to confess to one another, to take ownership and responsibility of our sins, flaws and weaknesses, and to apologize specifically for how we have hurt each other. 

As humbling as this can be, confession can bring an intimacy that is far greater than any prideful “rightness” could ever bring. Learn to confess to one another, and then to forgive one another.

4. Regularly Express Affection

Affection is usually the norm for at least the first few years of marriage. But a few years (and maybe a few children) later, the “honeymoon” stage wears off and affection can fall by the wayside.

When affection is no longer the “norm,” it’s something you must MAKE a priority. Even when you’re tired and overwhelmed, expressing affection is an action and reaction to one another that involves being deliberate and choosing to make time for intimacy, romance and quality time. It’s a part of marriage that you and your spouse have to learn to integrate into your day to day, rather than just saving it for special date nights. 

When affection is no longer the “norm,” it’s something you must MAKE a priority.

John and I give affection through our words, loving glances across the couch while reading books with the kids, holding hands in public or even across our dining room table. We’ve learned to show affection through our words, our actions and our attitudes with one another. And let me encourage you in saying that a little love goes a long, long way.

5. Stop to Intentionally Connect

With so many opportunities to “connect” throughout the day via Facebook, emails, text messages and interactions with others, sometimes our need for real-life connections is depleted by the time we get face-to-face with our spouse at the end of the day. 

You Might Also Like

John and I do our best to save our connecting for one another: to save our favorite stories of the day with each other, to call and text each other throughout the day, and to always save the last few minutes before bed as our time to emotionally connect. 

We’re deliberate in having deep and meaningful conversations with one another, and make the most of the time we’re apart by thinking about each other and then sharing those thoughts when we get the chance. We challenge ourselves to come together weekly to share what God is doing in our lives and to pray for one another. And truly, these are some of the most intimate moments in our relationship.

Though these things don’t really come naturally at first, in time, these small moments of connecting become second nature.

Marriage is not an easy road, and the proof of that is reflected in the many marriages around us that are falling apart. But God’s design for marriage is not to add burdens but to bring blessing into our lives. May God give us the grace to honor our relationships with our spouse, to invest in them and to show them the love of Jesus every opportunity we get. And may we be blessed in return.

This article was originally published at truelovedates.com

40 Comments

Sarah Davise Vadeo

1

Sarah Davise Vadeo commented…

hello my brothers and sisters i am here to give out testimony about this miracle doctor who has just so much made me believe in him with is miracle toward me, i have see and i can testify that there is a spell caster that can really bring back your ex immediately if you want to okay because DR.ODUDU has so much made me believe in spell. so please listen to my story friends about on how this miracle doctor brought back my ex okay, My Name is EMILY SARAH VADEO and i am from Philippians but lives in LONDOM, I am very happy for posting this miracle testimony on how a great spell caster helped me in bring back the love of my life. I know there are lots of women like me out there who have done so much to have back their Husband, I am here to tell you all to search no further because the answer is right here. I sincerely believe if there are up to five spell casters like Dr. ODUDU this world be a better place, I have seen people complaining on how fake spell castes promised to help them but couldn't, but with Dr. ODUU your problems is solved already. My Husband and I had been apart for 7 MONTHS and I couldn't bear without living with him, I have tried everything to have him back but nothing was working until I saw numerous testimonies on how miss Vivian Clem says about on how DR.ODUDU help her in bringing Clem back to her again, she says so much things about this spell caster call Dr. ODUDU and how great his work is. I contacted him immediately and follow the step that he ask and in the next 20 hours my husband called me and was eager for my forgiveness and that he wished nothing more than to have me in his arms forever. I filled so much joy and happiness that I found Dr. ODUDU, I hope you all here will find this testimony of mine and get your husband or wife back in just 24 hours. I want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution to a love break up.contacted him dr.oduduherbalhome@gmail.com or his hot line:+2348101571054 and his whasapp +2348101571054 contact him Via this email: dr.oduduherbalhome@gmail.com dr.oduduherbalhome@yahoo.com

(1) If you want your ex back.
(2) if you always have bad dreams
(3) You want to be promoted in your office.
(4) You want women/men to run after you.
(5) If you want a child/PREGNANCY SPELL.
(6) You want to be rich.
(7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be
yours forever.
(8) If you need financial assistance.
(9) How you been scammed and you want to recover you lost money.
(10)Stop Divorce
(11) CURE TO ALL KIND OF SICKNESS/DISEASES HERE
(12) Winning of lottery
(13) Cure To Hiv/Aids
(14) WINNING POLOTICS SPELL
(15) LOTTERY/LOTTO SPELL WINNING
(16) IF YOU NEED A BUSINESS SPELL
(17) IF YOU NEED A JOB SPELL
(18) FOOTBALL SPELL
(19) STEALING SPELL
2O) KILLING SPELL
(21) DIVOICE SPEL
(22)SPELL OF LUCK
(23)SPELL OF PROTECTION
(24) CURE TO HERPES AND ANY OTHER SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES AT ALL...
(25) HAVE YOU BEEN SCAMMED BEFORE AND NEEDS TO RECOVER ALL THE DOLLARS/MONEY YOU LOST TO THESE FRAUDSTER ???.. CONTACT DR.ODUDU

THANKS A LOT FOR LISTENING TO MY STORY MOST SPECIALLY YOU DR.ODUDU I PROMISE TO KEEP PRAISING YOU FOREVER IN MY LIFE

Jane Ella

3

Jane Ella commented…

These comments you see on the internet about DR ONOFE are not just comments, they are truthful words of experience written by those who have been there and found help in reuniting with the ones they hold dear to their heart and other marital and financial problems. I can tell you this because I also asked him for help to cast a love spell to fix my relationship with the only man I have ever loved. we got married but couldn't have a baby and then I discovered my womb was damaged. I had to try some spell casters but to no avail until I contacted DR ONOFE. HE restored my womb and just like that i got pregnant,i have given birth now and our baby is growing. Thank God for our lives and also to DR ONOFE who God has used to blessed us. I know that not everybody will believe this moreover its just something on the internet but my heart knows every of this word that formed this entire comment is true. his contact is: onofetemple@yahoo.com or onofetemple@gmail.com website:http://onofetemple.wix.com/http

Jane Ella

3

Jane Ella commented…

These comments you see on the internet about DR ONOFE are not just comments, they are truthful words of experience written by those who have been there and found help in reuniting with the ones they hold dear to their heart and other marital and financial problems. I can tell you this because I also asked him for help to cast a love spell to fix my relationship with the only man I have ever loved. we got married but couldn't have a baby and then I discovered my womb was damaged. I had to try some spell casters but to no avail until I contacted DR ONOFE. HE restored my womb and just like that i got pregnant,i have given birth now and our baby is growing. Thank God for our lives and also to DR ONOFE who God has used to blessed us. I know that not everybody will believe this moreover its just something on the internet but my heart knows every of this word that formed this entire comment is true. his contact is: onofetemple@yahoo.com or onofetemple@gmail.com website:http://onofetemple.wix.com/http
jijg

Cellina Anny

1

Cellina Anny commented…

These comments you see on the internet about DR ONOFE are not just comments, they are truthful words of experience written by those who have been there and found help in reuniting with the ones they hold dear to their heart and other marital and financial problems. I can tell you this because I also asked him for help to cast a love spell to fix my relationship with the only man I have ever loved. we got married but couldn't have a baby and then I discovered my womb was damaged. I had to try some spell casters but to no avail until I contacted DR ONOFE. HE restored my womb and just like that i got pregnant,i have given birth now and our baby is growing. Thank God for our lives and also to DR ONOFE who God has used to blessed us. I know that not everybody will believe this moreover its just something on the internet but my heart knows every of this word that formed this entire comment is true. his contact is: onofetemple@yahoo.com or onofetemple@gmail.com website:http://onofetemple.wix.com/http

Please log in or register to comment

Log In