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Why Young Adults are Leaving the Church

The reasons 20somethings are giving up on Sunday morning

What does it say about our generation that 40 to 50 percent of young Christians fail to stick with their faith or connect with a church after high school? Most likely, you’ve experienced or been witness to this exodus of twentysomethings from the faith community. At this point, it’s not even surprising to watch young adults become disillusioned with church as they go to college, build a career, start a family or begin their “real life”. But can it be stopped?

We recently spoke to Kara Powell, executive director of Fuller Youth Institute and co-author of Sticky Faith, to answer just that. Drawing from her extensive research with Fuller Youth Institute, she gave us a little more insight into what it takes to find a faith that sticks.

Do you think young people are just leaving the church, or leaving faith? Or is it both?

Probably my best answer to that is to describe what Tim Clydesdale—who is a sociologist in New Jersey—refers to as “the identity lock-box.” What students tend to do after they’ve graduated from high school is place important parts of themselves in an identity lock-box, and their faith is often part of that. The good news is that you put something in a lock-box when it’s important to you. So there is some sense that students still value their faith at one level. But the problem is when your faith is in a lock-box, especially as a college student or emerging adult, you’re making so many important decisions about worldview, and marriage, how you engage in risk behaviors, and vocation, and calling, and all those considerations are made while your faith is locked up in that lock-box. So there is some sort of residual sense that students value the faith, but it’s not influencing their day-to-day, or even major decisions. Given the long-term impact of those decisions throughout their adulthood, it’s pretty disconcerting.

Do you think there are any misunderstandings or misconceptions that contribute to young adults leaving the church?

The students involved in our research definitely tended to view the Gospel as a list of dos and do-nots, a list of behaviors. We asked our students when they were college juniors, “How would you define what it really means to be a Christian?” and one out of three—and these were all youth group students—didn’t mention Jesus Christ in their answer; they mentioned behaviors. So it seems like [young adults] have really picked up a behavioralist view of the Gospel. That’s problematic for a lot of reasons, but one of which is that when students fail to live up to those behaviors, then they end up running from God and the Church when they need both the most.

Are these mindsets limited only to young adults, or does it affect all ages?

Oh, yes, absolutely, [they] aren’t making this up on their own. They’re getting this from adults. Another issue that is particularly relevant to church leaders across the board is the importance of intergenerational relationships. We looked at 13 different youth group participation variables in our study, things they did in the context of youth group, to try and see what would be the biggest levers for sticky faith. To our surprise, the participation variable most highly related to mature faith both in high school and college was intergenerational worship; helping them connect with adults of all ages is a vital part of building adult faith. What we’re seeing is that not only are [intergenerational relationships] transformative in the lives of the teenagers, but they make a difference in the overall church. Imagine what a church would be like, what the adults in church would be like, if they were infused with the vitality that comes with teenagers? At the very least, if they were getting to know a few teenagers by name so they could pray for them, how life-giving would that be for the adults in a church?

What is an ideal model for the relationship between different generations in the faith community?

The original churches in the first century were multi-generational, were multi-ethnic. Especially as youth ministries become more professionalized in the last 50 years, [we’ve] ended up segregating kids from the rest of the church. Having said that, there’s definitely a time for 6-year-olds, and 16-year-olds and 86-year-olds to be together on their own. We need to provide space for folks in similar life spaces to chat and share community, but balance is something we swing through on our way to the other extreme.

It’s a common story: Young adults stop going to church, then once they have kids they return. It’s not like that’s a new phenomenon. Do you think this generation is different—or will they return to church again in a few years when they start having kids?

About 50 percent of those who drift from church seem to return, and it’s often because when they get older they get married and have kids. We at the Fuller Youth Institute are still grieving over the 50 percent who don’t return, and even in the 50 percent who do return—you make those important life decisions as college students, and then there are consequences you live with even after you’ve returned to the faith. It seems like students are drifting at a slightly higher percentage than in the past, and as adolescence is lengthening, they’re staying away from the church longer. As age of marriage is being delayed, having children is being delayed, so it’s just more years under the belt apart from God and full of the heartbreak and disappointment that comes from living your life apart from God.

How have your views of Church changed as you've become an adult? What makes you want to pull away? What makes you want to stay?

240 Comments

Dave Knickerbocker

7

Dave Knickerbocker commented…

My view of church has certainly changed. Church should be more about dialogue than dogma. I don't want to be told what to believer; I want to hear what the Bible is actually saying so I can know Jesus better - not to uphold the identity of an institution. It's scary that 33% of college juniorsyou refer to didn't mentioned Jesus as significant to their Christian faith.Church for them has become about behavior - just like the Pharisees. Ouch.

81,439

Honest commented…

Interesting that so many return once they have started a family... That's just it for me. I haven't started a family. I'm happy being single and until that changes I'd hope to find a church that welcomes me. Yeah, just me. I have tried tons of churches out... However, it seems very few are welcoming or even have anything available for a twentysomething single. Yet, the "church" is surprised people like me aren't there. Hmmm... that's backwards.

81,439

mytruejoy commented…

OBVIOUS ANSWER. It's always management's fault. The very people that post these websites and run the churches are the management of the church. It is their fault. For decades in church services I've listened to them talk about how young people lack faith, Don't desire the Lord, and how it's the fault of the world... or of Democrats... or of Liberals ... or whatever.... But it's management, it's always managements fault.
Management's main fault???? The main, overwhelming, so glaringly obvious management fault is that management consistently tries to make services ever more boring with ever longer one person in front talking too much while everyone else is expected to sit like sheep and listen. Notice how many people start looking around, read something, mouths fall open, look half asleep, and give every visible indication that they are bored during a sermon that goes past 20 minutes? So what does management do? They say, "Just one more point," or "Just a little longer," or "Just a few minutes and I'll finish," which means they will talk even longer still.

I and many people I meet, love passionate praise and worship services where WE GET A CHANCE to communicate and receive the emotional, mental, and spiritual communion with our Christ and Savior. But it's always the same thing. A churches management, after it builds it's membership based upon interesting and interactive services, starts cutting down on OUR OPPORTUNITY to deeply and profoundly be in the SPIRIT through praise and worship, etc. ... with some one or few persons who desperately need to be the center of attention, insisting on ever longer and more boring sermons or announcements. A membership increase may continue for a time just out of the momentum of the previously instituted optimal praise and worship service, but eventually with this being gradually replaced by extremely boring ... a few persons .... talking in front, while the rest of us are expected to just sit there like sheep taking orders, starts the churches downfall.

Ever notice how, after a few weeks, months, or years go by, the people in charge of displaying the words to songs on the overhead screens for praise and worship, start making mistakes, putting words out of order, and throwing off the singing for the congregation. Notice how the bands often start playing less passionate music or don't play in a way that optimally supports congregational participation? Mistakes like that don't happen if management really wanted the congregation to interactively participate. It means management doesn't value PRAISE AND WORSHIP by the congregation except as a means of building membership numbers so they can bore us with too long sermons. That's DECEPTION and deception is the language Christ ascribed to Satan.
I have frequent conversations with many people, most want more out of their churches but have been trained by these same churches to be sheep and not lions. The churches have trained them to be gutless and voiceless. So the church membership is soon composed of people who don't have the interactive skills to spread the Message of Jesus Christ to the waiting world. They only are trained to sit, listen, and take orders.
Many that drop out of church, have a great hunger for that Spirit of God which fills the thirst and hunger for Truth and Compassion. But the great obstructive to God's presence is the leadership which wants to talk and talk and talk... To them...Get a clue! You're boring!! ...

( To those churches and their leadership that are not like the above, you of course know that most churches are like the above. I also know you can't rock the boat because of powerful negative political, financial, and other internal and external institutional influences. So let people like me do it for you. It's okay. Just do the best you can. I'm on your side.)

81,439

Kanewood1 commented…

There IS something wrong with the church. Some teachings have come through loud and clear. Even if they are not said out loud from the pulpit, the message comes through loud and clear. The Catholic Church has taught that is it okay, and in some cases the better choices, the cover up pedophilia. Even a child can sense that is wrong. And anyone who has read the Bible will know that Jesus would never encourage us to denigrate ANY other human being. Ever. No exceptions. Churches seem to be becoming embroiled in the concept that the only two sins against God are abortion and homosexuality. They are teaching that such judgments absolve us from the sin of hatred.

Jonathan Castro

1

Jonathan Castro commented…

If you've never met God in church, why would you keep going? Totally pointless.

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