By Brandon Roth
January 23, 2007
I sit here and wonder what goes on in a woman's mind. What is she thinking? What consumes her thoughts? But really, I'll never know. I can only guess as to what we men ... pardon—boys—say and do to make these (young) women around us think different things about themselves and each other. (The title of "man" comes only when God molds him, says "it is good" and she agrees. Don't think any differently, boys. I'm right there with you.)
A friend of mine shared with me a brief video/advertisement for Dove's Campaign For Real Beauty. Please take a look at it. Boys, don't be embarrassed to watch it. It would be good for all of us.
What did you think of it? I like how they titled it Evolution. That one word says a lot about the way we advertise, judge others, market ourselves, think about our bodies and think about how our best is not good enough based on this false standard of beauty our society has created. That woman was not real! The face on the billboard is a woman that you will never be able to meet in person. Dove is trying to bring this problem—that many of us don't see as a problem—to our attention: the evolution of the meaning of "beauty."
We look at the magazines and women think "She is sooooo beautiful!" and boys think (to themselves) "Dang! She is hot!"
What is wrong with this?Well, first of all, ladies, she really doesn't ever look that good in real life and, boys, imagine what your words do to each and every female around you. You are attracted to the impossible beauty, which pushes so many young women up against the mirror and basically tells them, "You are not good enough. You are not beautiful."
You think I'm getting carried away? Everyone has been getting carried away by the fashion magazines, the runway models and pornography.
Boys: We have grown up with hormones raging through us, and we think about sex—a lot. What do we do? We find the "beauty" we long for on magazine shelves, on the boob-tube, in the stores and on the Internet. We are skewing our idea of beauty, and when we get married—if ever—we will come to find out that our wife is not an airbrushed porcelain trophy!! But she is more beautiful than that. She is real with feelings and gorgeous blemishes, not an image of eye candy or a mere turn-on of sexual desire.
Ladies: I apologize for the way we, boys, have made it come to this. You are beautiful for who you are, not the way you look. You have so much more to offer those around you than this world's expectant small dress size, perfect abs and large breasts. It cannot be about that.
Boys, we are here to affirm beauty, not analyze and judge it. We are here to uplift everyone around us, not just those we find attractive or want to date. We need to encourage the disheartened. This goes for both genders!
Let me briefly explain something. I don't think all girls are constantly freaking out that boys are judging them based on their looks. It's a subconscious thing for many woman. They don't know it, but they go about their day like they're under a looking glass. They'd probably refute that statement. So if I'm wrong, boys, let's pretend like I'm right! Tell them and show them they are beautiful creatures made in the image of God!
Is it possible for us to show every female that we are not immature, shifty-eyed and arrogant? I know it is possible if we're willing to step up, fall on our knees and allow God to make us real men of integrity and respect. It'll hurt at first, but it'll feel good in the end, because we will know what true beauty is through Christ’s perspective, and we will be able to love the one we marry, affirm her beauty in all we say and do, treat her as we would want to be treated and live out a faithful marriage with her to the day we die.