Now Reading
10 Things We Miss About ’90s Christian Bookstores

10 Things We Miss About ’90s Christian Bookstores

The world is changing. You can feel it in the water. You can feel it in the sky. You can definitely feel it in the bookstores, where the digital revolution has taken its toll. Following the advent of eBay, Amazon and, well, blogs, bookstores are different places. Just ask the people who used to work at Borders. Things ain’t what they used to be.

Christian bookstores aren’t exempt from this. Family Christian Bookstores, the largest Christian bookstore chain in America, recently filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. They don’t plan on laying off any employees, but it’s a reminder of how different things are now from the bookstores many of us grew up around. And in the spirit of those bookstores, which are quickly going the way of all flesh, here’s a list of a few things we’ll miss about them.

Theologically Questionable Jesus Toys

We’re not saying that Jesus wouldn’t run the read option or take ride on a sweet hog, we’re just saying it may qualify as a grey area.


Read Option Jesus


American Chopper Jesus

Copyright-skirting Jesus Shirts

Nothing says “checkmate, atheists” like one of these.


Admit it, you owned this one.


Sweet.


There’s a lot going on here.

Super Fancy Robes

They definitely look more comfortable than suits.


Crushed velvet is the new black.


A sleek, subtle choice.

Shofars

Surprisingly, these are only stores in the mall that still sell ancient instruments fashioned from the horns of large rams.


Own the whole collection.

Majestic Lions Printed on Stuff

We have C.S. Lewis to thank for this trend.


A perfect accessory to your power suit.


To drink your coffee from while wearing your faux-Starbucks shirt.

Patriotic Jesus Art

JesUSA


American flag robe sold separately, alas.


There’s also a lot going on here.

Edible Scriptures

Bread of Heaven. Snacks of earth.


Because your breath isn’t the only thing that needs freshening.


The red jellybeans represent Christ’s blood shed for us.

Very Demographic-Specific Bibles

When an ordinary Bible just won’t cut it.


Rad!


No nerds allowed.

Loving Bumper Stickers

And they shall know we are Christians by our cars.


Not to be a stickler, but that fish definitely looks like it’s about to fry.


Comic Sans, just to rub it in.

Katy Hudson CD’s

Only true youth group kids know the full tale of the woman the world would come to know as Katy Perry. And Christian bookstores are about the only proof of her past that still exists.


Never forget.

View Comments (4)

Leave a Reply

© 2023 RELEVANT Media Group, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Scroll To Top

You’re reading our ad-supported experience

For our premium ad-free experience, including exclusive podcasts, issues and more, subscribe to

Plans start as low as $2.50/mo